If you feel like you are losing everything, remember that trees lose their leaves every year and still stand tall and wait for better days to come. But in your case, you cannot wait for better days to come, you have to work for better day! Let me disclaim that this is not some kind of motivational talk, I am basically sharing my experiences on how I have reacted towards failure, and disappointing moments I have experienced during the course of my academic endeavours.
To be sure that things are well understood, failure is the state or condition of notmeeting a desirable or intended objective. Failure is an unwanted teacher, because it is the bitterest way to learn. However failure is still life's greatest teacher. Failure is a bitter pill to consume, it is hard, it is a painful process, and at some point, it would seem like nothing can ease the pain. But here is one thing you need to know, as much as it hurts, it is for a better preparation for success. Failure helps to shape and mould us. Failure is a prerequisite for success- Yes! This might sound outrageous but failure is not loss because you change, you learn and you grow.
If you have failed in the past and you are looking for a glimmer of hope, know this: “Success is not possible without failure.” Like Herman Melville said “Failure is the true test of greatness.” In this light, I will be sharing tips to help one recover quickly from failure. These tips have been personally applied and they have proven to be effective.
1. Accept Failure
You will never recover from failure or get better if you keep blaming others or some factors for your failure. You have to take responsibility for your mistakes if you are truly desirous for progress. As difficult as this seems, you just have to learn how to accept failure. Accepting failure is the first and most important step to take. You must be willing to accept failure and also have the courage to start again. For the purpose of easing the understanding of my point, I will cite a helpful example. There are sometimes when you prepared rigorously for an exam, and you are so confident to have a good result but yet you got a disappointing result. The first step to recovering from this is to ensure that you accept that you have failed that course, and that you are determined to identify what went wrong and work on them. This is accepting failure!
Jodi Goldstein, Managing Director of the Harvard Innovation Labs, said that one of the most important lessons she can teach her student is to learn how to fail gracefully. Failure is a learning process and one got to learn how to accept it and be deliberate and intentional about improvement. This would lead me to my next point which I tag as THE 3Rs.
2. The 3Rs (Re-strategise, Reconstruction & Replan)
It is simple mathematics, you can't keep doing the same thing and expect to get a different result. A sign that you have truly taken responsibility for yourself and accepted your failure is your willingness to adjust and take drastic steps to change how you used to do your things, in order to salvage you from your present condition. Therefore, after accepting failure, you have to re-strategize, reconstruct and re-plan.
Before one can execute this, ask yourself these salient questions.
• What are the things I have done wrongly?
• What can I learn from my past failure?
• How can I avoid making the same mistake?
• How can I do better next time?
Take some time to answer these questions and be honest with yourself while
answering them. The first step to a successful re-strategy is to know or identify why your initial attempt failed. If this is done, it gives you an insight on what to correct; If not, you will change your plan again and you will keep getting the same failed results. Understanding why you failed are the lessons you take from failure. They serve as an indication of things you shouldn't do if you desire a better result. After you have analysed the situation and you have identified valuable lessons from them, the next step is the process of re-planning. For example, if you identified that you were not assimilating, you could reschedule your reading time to fit with your body type. Or you discovered you didn't do so well because you couldn't complete the outline, then it means you have to increase your reading time. This is re-strategy! Don't just change plans, analyse why your plans didn't work initially, reflect on
circumstances that warranted that; then map out another plan, and trust yourself that things would change.
Right planning might be a tedious task, but it is definitely not as tedious as executing your plans. Most worthwhile achievements require that one persevere even when assailed by doubts. What keeps you going literally in times like this is your determination. Determination is the drive of goal attainment in spite of obstacles. For determination to be achieved, you need to:
• Set a clear plan or goal for yourself.
• Believe in your plan or goal (you can do anything when you believe in yourself).
• Execute your plan and goal religiously.
It must also linger at the back of your mind that it is not going to be easy, but with determination it keeps you going. Determination is a fuel which wheels one’s engine when the mind is willing but the body is not. To be determined, you must have the ability to be persistent. Persistence is the ability to hold on to something without giving up. Like Napoleon Hill said- “Whatever the mind of a man can conceive and believe, He can achieve.” When you set your heart and mind into a goal, no matter the obstacles, your determination will make you achieve such goals. Also, say to yourself everyday “YEA, I CAN DO IT!” Thomas Edison who is the first person to discover light bulb failed multiple times before he successfully invented the light bulb. You've got to figure out what exactly works for you and what doesn’t. After discovering, execute!
4. Conducive Environment.
It is important to state that a conducive environment does not mean a place that is comfortable for you. A conducive environment is an atmosphere that assists or facilitates the ease of achieving a set goal. This could be a serene environment that helps learning, or a group of friends that stimulates you to do better; it could be anything or anyone, so far as it significantly assists you to achieve your set goals. You must learn how to recognise the value of creating a positive environment. Most importantly, build strong and positive relationship(s) that leads to greater success. Relationship influences everything. You must be willing to learn and engage with others who have come before you. Surround yourself with go-getters, positive minded persons, and persons that will motivate you to do better for yourself and become a better version of you.
5. Put God First
In all endeavors of our lives we must put God first no matter the circumstances we find ourselves in. Draw yourself closer to Him and put all your trust in Him. When we fail, God sure has as a reason, we might not understand at that moment but it is always for a better and bigger plan He has for us. The Holy Bible assures us in Jeremiah 8:4 that “when a man falls down, he gets up again. And if a man goes the wrong way, he turns around and comes back.” Take a step of faith and trust God. Philippians 4:3 says “I can do all things through Christ that strengthens me.” When you fail, go to God in prayer and ask for strength and courage to go through that difficult phase and He sure will be there for you.
In conclusion, If at first you do not succeed, try, try, try, and try again until you attain your goals. So get up! Put the past behind you, stay focused and tread the path of success.
Best wishes folks.