I was listening to an episode of "I Said What I Said Podcast" and I can't exactly remember what sparked the conversation but I know it had something to do with the Big Brother Naija housemates. Jolz said something that really struck a specific chord in my brain.
Many people have a lack mindset and they operate from a space of scarcity. This is why when someone is winning, they count it as a loss to themselves.
And sadly this is the mentality that a lot of people operate with. When you believe and act as if there is not enough opportunity to go around and you begin to resent other people who seem to be "getting ahead", then you have what Stephen Covey termed, ‘Scarcity Mentality’ or ‘lack mindset’.
Let's take it back to when we were really young and how society made us feel like we needed to out-perform each other. You hear words like, "Look at your mates, does James have 10 heads, you are a disappointment" and many more words along this line. This brought a lot of pressure on us that we lost sight of our journey and were being pitted against each other. The actual ghetto right? 😂
Many of us have for too long been trapped in the "mindset of lack" that we unconsciously see other human beings as threats. I personally have been here and it was only through self-awareness and having a deep understanding of who I am that I realised that my only competition is ME.
I like the way Tiwalola Ogunlesi of Confident & Killing it explains comparison. She says:
Comparison is just like you driving a car. Instead of you centring your focus on where you are going and what is ahead of you, you are consistently turning sideways to see how far other people have gone.
It's a no-brainer. It's just a matter of time before you crash. Nothing good comes out from you being jealous about other people's wins. It just keeps you in a space of darkness and doom. If you find yourself being resentful, judgemental and uncomfortable when other people's lights are shinning, then, that's a sign that you have a lack mindset.
Here is what I want you to know:
What is meant for you, will not pass you by - as long as you are actively and consistently going after it and even if someone else gets that particular thing that you are gunning for, it's still okay. Your time will come. It is just not your time yet.
We all have our individual journeys and that's what we should focus on. No one is taking anything away from you. Applaud other people's wins.
When I see other people securing bags, I celebrate them because not only is it inspiring but it gives me an understanding that winning is possible for me too.
Now, here is where you reflect - Do You Have A Lack Mindset?